Wednesday, October 28, 2015

ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY: THE SOAP SCAM THAT NEVER WORKS


Last week on General Hospital, Alexis took it upon herself to run a DNA test proving that Olivia’s newly adopted son, Mateo, was actually Leo, the baby Olivia gave birth to and claimed died a dew months earlier. Olivia spun her lie because Leo’s father, Julian (currently Alexis’ boyfriend), is a well-known mobster, and after hiding her first-born son, Dante, from his mobster daddy, Sonny, Olivia knows only one way to parent (not getting pregnant by mobsters was apparently never considered as an option).

However, Alexis (who, once upon a time hid her own daughter, Kristina, from her father, the aforementioned Sonny, for the exact same reason that Olivia was now hiding Leo from Julian, and even used the same man, Ned, to pretend to be the dad) decided that since Julian swore he was out of the mob these days, it was perfectly safe for him to co-parent Leo. And it was her job to make that happen. This is the same Alexis who goes around incessantly reminding anyone who’ll listen (and many who won’t) that she is a strong, independent, infinitely admirable woman who needs a man the way a fish needs a bicycle, power to feminism, girl power, et. al…. But when it came to choosing between her fellow woman, Olivia, currently in the exact same predicament Alexis once found herself in and making the exact same choice, and Julian – who has really, really nice abs and is willing to give Alexis the time of day – guess who came out on top?

So there’s no question about it. Alexis is the worst.

But Olivia is also an idiot. Claim your infant is dead, then show up a few weeks later with a tot the exact same age he would have been whom you claim you adopted? Seriously? Odds are even baby Leo/Mateo didn’t fall for that bit of chicanery.

Then again, Olivia isn’t the first soap-opera heroine to come up with that brilliantly diabolical scheme. Check out five of her historical foremothers from Days of Our Lives, As the World Turns, All My Children, Guiding Light, and Another World at "Entertainment Weekly," here.

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